So, I was on a diet for about a week and a half, lost a whopping 3.2 pounds and was so mean and grouchy that apparently nobody at the flower shop wanted to work with me, super. On Tuesday I had Mr. Coconut bring me Jimmy John’s and immediately after I ate it… All! I was a completely different person. So, I’m starting to think dieting is not for me. In other words, I need to force myself to exercise. I hate exercising by the way, actually I hate getting ready, going there, getting started and most importantly, sweating! Sigh.
Yesterday I woke up, got my headlight fixed and headed for the grocery store. I had a list of crap I need to buy in an effort to feed my family this weekend. I’m hoping I bought enough, but my brother and I eat like cows. If you make a fat joke, I’ll punch your face in.
I’m trying to do a bunch of cooking prior to their arrival and so far I’ve made: glop, some apple breakfast thing, picked up two frozen pizza’s, made some snickerdoodle Chex mix thing and some yummy peanut butter bars things. I also bought little snacks for the babies, Izzy likes bananas so I got him some and I got them some little Lunchables, fruit snacks and juice pouch things.
Yesterday I had a second interview at the old folks home and it went pretty well (we'll talk more about this later). While I was waiting to be interviewed I was going through a scrapbook someone had made when I came across the "Red Hat Party." There sat a bunch of little old ladies, donning red hats and smiles and then there was Helen...
Apparently, Helen is no longer "with us," but I guarantee she would have been my favorite. Apparently she had a thing for the physical therapist so the staff set up a little date for her. The guy had lunch with her in the cafeteria and even brought her roses, ha! How cute is that!
Last night was my “Let’s Get Metaphysical” class and we learned how to do Tarot readings. At the beginning of class we were asked to do another one of those creepy meditation things and as usual, I did not participate. Afterward we were asked to pull a card from our deck and share with the class what we saw on the card. “I see a blindfolded woman,” said one freaky chick. “I believe this symbolizes that I’m not seeing something important in my life and I need to pay more attention to my surroundings.” How she got that from the card I don’t know, because I saw a scene from a porno.
When it got to me I said, “I see Jesus playing a drum at a circus.” Moving on…
We continued to give ourselves readings and it wasn’t long before I was asking the “professional” what she saw in my cards. Interestingly enough they were both very accurate.
My last one said I’m going through a really difficult time (true), I need to keep pushing forward and my grandpa will have my back. Cute.
After class a woman who apparently was on the ghost hunt with me in Brigham City approached me. She spent twenty minutes telling me about her ghostly experiences and offered me several tips on ghost hunting. Basically, she suggested I go sit in a cemetery with a tape recorder. Maybe you’re wondering why I’m telling you this. Well, for whatever reason and I think I get this from my father? Weird people love me, seriously. I’m a magnet.
On the way out to my car I noticed someone, probably a student at the high school where the community education class takes place, dropped their dirty chonies. Sadly they probably have a boyfriend (or girlfriend) and get more ass than me.
In other news, I’m exhausted. I’ve been running around trying to get everything (shopping, cooking, laundry, etc.) done before my nephews get here. Despite how pooped I am I can’t wait to see the little guys, they’re growing up so fast it breaks my heart. Last night my little Izzy left me a voicemail, “Sauerkraut. I come see you. At house.” So precious. He’s growing up and I want him to stay little forever.
Finally, I was offered the position at the senior living center this afternoon. I’m very relieved that I found some work and very excited to try something new. I have always loved old people and I think it will be fun to work with them. However, I do wonder how I’ll react when Helen doesn’t show up for bingo because she died the night before. I’m sure they will provide me with TONS of awesome stories for my blog.
To celebrate my new job I treated myself to a little something, something I’ve been wanting for my apartment for a while, a flower thing-a-ma-bob!
I was assembling it when the realtor and some potential buyers came to look at my apartment. I seriously hope it sells soon because I’m sick of random people walking through my apartment at all hours of the day. However, this couple seemed really nice and I didn’t hesitate to tell them I’d like it if they’d clean up the property. I also hinted to them that they should keep the rent where it is.
Well, that is all for now. Tomorrow I have a busy day: exercise, a hair appointment (I’m going back to brown because I can’t find anyone to help me maintain my hair and going to weddings/interviews with 2 inch roots is not a good look), work and then… The nephews!
That is all.
Sauerkraut
I love the stories from your metaphysical class. And your work stories remind me of things Mr. R. says about work. Apparently he was helping an old lady get in bed and she turned to another lady and told her that he was "going to make sexy time now."
ReplyDeleteAnd I love your flower thingy. :)