Surgery Part 2

Sauerkraut Here

Tuesday was my surgery. The morning of I was pretty grouchy (no surprise there), I wanted to hurry up and get it over with but at the same time I was really annoyed that I had to do this all again. Everything went the same as it did before, but this time was a lot rougher on me than the first. 

So high.

To begin, the anesthesiologist came into my room to give me my IV (1… We’re counting the needle stabs because I HATE needles) and he stabbed through my vain, neat-o. So the other anesthesiologist had to insert my IV (2) into my other arm.

At this point I suppose I was given drugs because I remember nothing.

When I woke up from surgery, it was awful. I could feel my entire body shaking with tremors and I remember someone telling me that they would give me something for that. I’m not sure when they gave me something, but eventually they went away.

Then I remember telling someone I didn’t feel good. The next thing I know I was breathing in alcohol. They put an alcohol pad under my nose to make me feel better, what the fuck!? Is that healthy? Is that legal? I remember smelling it, throwing it off my face and telling someone “I don’t want this thing.” After some lady came to take my blood (3), I barfed, barfed some more and barfed some more. Thanks for the alcohol strip; it worked like a fucking charm.

Then I sat there, with my pan of barf, crying, hysterically, for over an hour and a half while they ignored me, seriously. It’s like they placed me right in front of the clock to torture me. They also placed me next to some lady who was making the most disturbing noises, had a doctor with the most annoying voice ever who wouldn’t shut the fuck up and go away, and she peed herself! Then she was having a shit fit because she didn’t want the male CNA to help her clean up… Fucking Mormons. I just wanted my barf pan emptied and mom!

The next thing I knew I was being asked to move myself, right after surgery, from my surgery bed to an ambulance stretcher… With my pan of barf! I was then transported into an ambulance and informed that there are hallways connecting the two hospitals but someone died during transport and now they use an ambulance to transport patients instead, awesome, thanks for sharing. So I took a quick ambulance ride… Where I focused entirely on the number of people that had died in the ambulance and my barf not sloshing out of its pan onto my gown. When I arrived at my new hospital again, I was asked to move myself off the stretcher and onto my new bed and yes; I still had my pan of barf.

Once I found myself in a new hospital, in a new room with a new bed lots of people were rushing in and out. Then Mr. Coconut walked in. At first I thought he was the doctor but then I realized my doctor was not big or brown. When I realized it was him I burst into tears and started screaming for my mom. Poor Mr. Coconut was scared shitless (I don’t think he’s ever seen me that hysterical before), he was trying to help me by going to look for my mom but I wouldn’t let him leave me, he didn’t know what to do. When my mom walked in the room it was full of people, one of whom was taking my blood (4) and by then I had had it! I was yelling, screaming and crying because I just wanted to be alone with my people.

As soon as everyone left I told my mom how mean they were to me and how much pain I was in and blah, blah, blah. I don’t remember much after that because I think they gave me some morphine to calm me down and when I woke up, someone was taking my blood (5).

The next several hours were very painful. Not only was my neck in pain from the incision but apparently the anesthesia settles… And it settled in the back of my head. It was the most uncomfortable feeling… I’m trying to think of how to describe it… It was very tender and it felt like my skull was aching yet I couldn’t get to it to rub it for comfort, meanwhile it felt like it was about to explode from pressure. Seriously, I wondered if my ears and eyes were going to pop off.

The pain lasted for several hours and several doses of pain medication, which made me barf by the way. A lot of barfing this time around, a lot. But I started feeling better the next morning at around 4:30AM… When I was awoken by a guy coming in to take more of my blood (6). Apparently I have tiny, deep swimming veins and my red blood cells like to explode and clot? P.S. My hand is still tender and bruised.

The tube in my neck/bloody Easter egg.

When my mom arrived at around 6:00AM I was ready to get the hell out of there. I wanted nothing to do with my ET Finger (I was convinced it was cutting off my circulation), I no longer wanted a tube in my neck, my ass was numb from laying in that bed, I was sick of wearing those stupid socks with the grip tape on the bottom of them and was over those stupid boots you have to wear to keep your blood moving. But alas, we weren’t released until about Noon.

Now I am home. I’m taking lots of different medications and trying to take it easy. It’s already Friday and I’m not looking forward to returning to work. Don’t get me wrong, I love my jobs, but it’s nice to lay down when I get tired.

My next appointment is on August 22nd. It’s nothing major, I think they’ll just remove my bandage, talk about the surgery, the medication and my next steps.

From my understanding my next step will be to visit another doctor who will cover the radiation aspect of the process. It’s not what it used to be… Apparently you used to be locked in a room, away from your friends and family, left to drink a liquid delivered to you by people in space suits. Now, I will have the take a pill or drink something, probably drink something. Yes, I will be radioactive for a period of time, so I can’t be around anyone and no one can eat off my dishes and such for a period of time, but whatever.

After radiation I will be left to take a medication, every day, for the rest of my life (hopefully it’s a short one). I’m sure it will take a while to find the correct one (type/dosage) and I will need to do some regular screenings to ensure I’m cancer free, but I guess that’s the way it goes. The nurse said it will be about 3 months before I start to feel “normal” again.

Personally, my concerns are my energy level and my weight. If you’ve known me for a long time I’ve never been the one to run out of energy and need a nap. Now, I get worn out very easy. I also have mood swings (this is normal I guess) I’ll be grouchy, then hyper and then need a nap.

I’ve been thinking of little things I can do to lose some of this weight, I’ve never been this big in my life and it’s very uncomfortable and upsetting. At this point I’m going to try: not eating out, cooking healthier meals and swimming. Swimming is natural for me, it takes me forever to get in the water, but once I’m there, I’ll stay for hours and it’s a good full body workout that isn’t too hard on your body.

I’m also reading (no jokes please) a book on thyroid type crap. So far, I’m very confused by the book, here’s why… I’ve had this nodule growing in my neck since my early days in college and many of the things I’ve been dealing with over the past few years are “symptoms of a thyroid imbalance:”

- Always fatigued or exhausted

- Irritable and impatient

- Feeling too hot or too cold

- Depressed, anxious or panicky

- Bothered by changes in my skin or hair

- At the mercy of my moods

- Inexplicably gaining or losing weight

- Losing enthusiasm for life

- Sleeping poorly or insomniac

However, according to my blood work my thyroid was functioning fine. So, are these things I’ve been dealing with results of my fucked up ness or my thyroid?

In other news, Mr. Coconut brought me flowers in the hospital…

Sauerkraut: “Thanks for the flowers.”

Mr. Coconut: “Read the card!”

Sauerkraut: I open it, “There’s nothing on it?” Seriously, he didn’t write anything on the card, it was blank.

Mr. Coconut: “Read the outside of the card.” Meaning the envelope.

Sauerkraut: “The Black Iris?”

Mr. Coconut: “Yes! They are Black Irish’s!” He’s so proud of himself in this moment.

Sauerkraut: “Okay these are Gerber daisies and the name of the store that made them is the Black Iris, not the Black Irish!” Sigh. He tries so hard.

I also got a yummy cake from Nothing Bundt Cakes from my co-workers at the old folk’s home and I received a birthday card from Sheek Geek and Tar-J… Three months early, haha! I love it. Seriously, I love it. The best part… they thought they were late sending it. Dying! I will treasure it forever.

That is all (for now).

Sauerkraut