Last Thursday I got my first, and very possibly my last, Brazilian wax. It was the most painful experience of my life!!! Aside from the time I tried to do it myself. However, I love the results. I would happily post photos of my newly waxed Pikachu but my brother reads this blog.
Also, on Thursday I saw Warrant in concert. There are very few songs that can take over my body and enable me to climb atop a table and dance like a whorish idiot, but Cherry Pie by Warrant can do that.
On Friday, after a week of preparation, my mother and I packed up and headed to Lava Hot Springs, Idaho for a camping trip. To make a long story short, it was almost the worst camping trip ever…
The worst camping trip ever was the night I slept in a 1-2 man tent with I Heart To Fart, our friend Kirsten and Buddy (I Heart To Fart’s Dog). I got little to no sleep that night because the four of us were stuffed in the tent like a giant shadoobie in a colon. We were so cramped in that fucking tent that we all had to sleep in the same position, if one of us changed position, we all had to change position. Also, Buddy felt it was necessary to sleep between Kirsten and I, pulling the covers off me and because it was so cold, the moisture in the air soaked my clothing.
Another awful camping trip, also with I Heart To Fart, was when “raccoons” ate my doughnuts. Back to the story…
Ideally I wanted a large group of people sitting around talking and laughing. I wanted to get my cards read, spend some time at the pool, float the river, and soak in the hot pools.
Instead, people came and went, I ended up working both Friday night and Saturday morning and we got rained out. Suck fuck.
On Sunday we (Mom, Mr. Coconut and I) packed up, rushed up home and spent the afternoon washing the tents and chairs. Into the evening we ate Mexican take-out and watched a plethora of Red Box movies. It was the perfect end to an awful campout and I’ve decided that I’m much better at slumber parties than I am at camping.
On Monday I spent the day cleaning, organizing and crafting, it was great. After a few days of not doing these things I get really irritable and angry. The best way to describe it is to have you imagine there are demon bugs crawling under your skin, you can scratch and dig at them, but they don’t get out until you clean, organize and craft.
Sometime on Tuesday I started working on my cake for the fair, and today, I threw it in the garbage. So, I guess I will not be entering a pumpkin or a cake into the fair this year. I’m not sure why I can’t pull off a good cake for the fair, but I’m guessing it’s because I’m being compared to and judged by real cake decorators, it’s too much pressure.
Ironically, my “little brother” asked me to make his wedding cake today… Scary!
Congrats on your engagement/new house kido's!
I spent the remainder of the day working on my nephews Halloween costume (a garden gnome) and it’s coming along great, I just hope it fits? Today I finished his boots, too cute.
In other news:
- I was in the paper… And they spelled my name wrong… After I spelled it out to them.
- My grandmother’s porn name is “Boy Haliday.” Seriously, I’m dying. Dying!
- I received the following text from Chickpea: “My mom is an embarrassment. We were watching a movie on the Greek channel; there was a fish tank, as a joke a character in the movie put a dildough in the tank. My mom said, ‘what kind of fish is that?’ I said, ‘mom! It’s a big penis!” Wow. How did she have 5 kids?”
- Something happened to my grandmother's dog, it looks even dumber.
That is all.
Sauerkraut
1) You did not just use "stuffed in the tent like a giant shadoobie in a colon." I think you officially win for the best simile I've ever heard in my life.
ReplyDelete2) I wish I could've gone camping with you! Even with the rain. I have a grilled-sandwich maker on a stick thing that I LOVE and we would make all kinds of crazy good shit with.
3) What were you in the paper for?